First Snow

They weren't quite sure what to make of it, but we had fun.

Finally, some photos from home!

Most of you know that we live in a small Victorian terrace- those of you in Australia, you've no doubt seen these in The Bill. This means that we only have windows at the front and back of the house (since the side walls are shared with our neighbours). Also, it's always raining. This means that our house is dark. Like, DARK. As in, really, really dark. This has been driving me absolutely crazy because I've got these adorable babies, constantly doing cute things, and it is impossible to get decent photos when there is no light. (SLR users - when I say dark, I've set my portrait lens to f/1.8 and in the middle of the day I'm still needing a shutter speed of about 1/2 s in natural light. At f/1.8. So yeah, dark).

Anyway, long story short, I got myself a really bright light, and now we have some photos that aren't just a big blurry mess. (Note two for SLR users - I also pulled out my big flash, which helped a lot, and yes of course I should have done that earlier. But even using ceiling bounce, which is really my only trick, I find it hard to get nice light with this as my primary source. Any tips for home lighting setups that can be managed between naps would be much appreciated. And mum, don't just say move back to Brisbane please).

So anyway, less talking, more cuteness, yes? (And apologies, by the way, to anybody who is getting a thankyou card from me because these are the same photos. Pretend to be surprised, okay?)

I really, really underestimated how hard it is to get two babies looking at the camera at the same time. Or even with their heads facing in approximately the right direction. Trying for smiles as well? Or matching clothes? Hmmmm, not yet.


I'm so pleased about how chubby they are getting.

This is beautiful baby Lulit.

and her little feet
Lulu has found her hands
and loves to smile and shout
and this is her pirate face. She opens her mouth like this and makes a loud 'ARGGGHHH' sound, like a pirate. I wasn't really expecting a baby who was ready to sail the high seas.
Baby Isaias wasn't really in the mood for smiling (he's still in his pyjamas, to my shame) but I got this one:
and this one:
but overall, he found the whole experience fairly confusing. I'll try again another day.
(Note three - does anybody know how to get around the issue of the blockiness of these photos on blogspot? They are not blocky in real life, and look completely different on flickr).

Finally, some photos from Addis!

I've been meaning to post photos of our trip, but have found it hard for two reasons - firstly, the two new little people in the house never letting me get near the computer, of course, but secondly - unexpected freaked-out-ness about their early little selves. I look at their early photos and they are still my beautiful babies, but they are so tiny that I hardly recognise them. It's only now that they are filling out that I can really see how terrifyingly titchy they were. And that makes me feel really sad.

So, I am going to post the photos with a commentary about when they were taken, otherwise you'll think you're looking at different babies.

Stage one: This is the babies on their first day home. They are cute, but did I already say terrifyingly titchy? I can hardly bear to look at these photos, and that's not just because I look h.a.g.g.a.r.d.

No, it's because my beautiful girl and boy look so unbearably tiny.



Stage two: The next few days. We've dressed them in tiny clothes that are somehow still way too big, and they are just beginning to figure out which way is up. We get some smiles, but there is a lot of uncertainty. As indeed there should be.



Stage three: Ahhhh, this is more like what the babies are really like. They are starting to fill out and their personalities are really beginning to show. Tummy time is still a complete mystery to them, by the way.

Yes, baby girl, it's all been a bit of a shock to mummy too.
Stage four: A few weeks in. Is it just me, or are they starting to just look like ordinary spoiled children here? Maybe it's just the light, but I think they are starting to glow.

So, that's the baby pictures from Addis. They have woken up, so I must go. More later.

And suddenly, things started to happen very fast...

We've had a difficult few days trying to sort out visas (the entire
casework team at the Home Office was down with Swine Flu). We wrote
many strongly worded emails, and made some strongly worded phone
calls, and finally got good news yesterday that they were being
processed. We picked them up this morning and then went across the
road to the Ethiopian Airlines office, where our skills at wording
things strongly turned out to be needed even more urgently.

We were told that we wouldn't be able to change our flights to any
date earlier than Wednesday, which would have meant that Mum was at
risk of missing her connecting flight to Australia on Thursday.
Fortunately, John has a very impressive ability to sit in a chair and
not move until someone does something helpful, and after 1 1/2 hours
of this we were told that we could fly tonight. I think they did this
just to guarantee we wouldn't come back tomorrow.

Anyway, this means that we are flying tonight! After weeks of not much
happening, we're about to go. We're going to miss lots of things about
Addis, but not the being-new-parents-in-a-hotel-room part. We'd
probably better go and finish the packing...

My laptop has died (am typing this at an internet cafe) hence no
photos, again. Will post more when we come home, I promise. The babies
are hardly recognisable - Project Chubby is definitely off to a flying
start.

Missing everyone, looking forward to seeing friends and family soon

lots of love

John and Caroline

Visas and Passports and Forms (oh my!)

Tomorrow it will be two weeks since we passed court. This last
fortnight has been a total, total blur. In some ways it's hard to
believe that two weeks have passed already, but mostly it's already
beginning to feel like I've spent my entire life in this hotel room,
with a bottle in one hand and a baby (or two) in the other. Both
babies are in panic-eating mode, all day and all night, which is
incredibly tiring for the grownups, but it's been amazing to see them
gain over a pound already in the time they have been in our care. The
respiratory infection that Isaias came home with has now cleared up,
and they both seem happy and healthy. Lulu is even starting to get
fat rolls on her thighs, which makes us all very happy.

As well as feeding (and feeding and feeding) the babies, we've had one
other big task - get permission for them to come home! John has now
managed to get their court documentation, birth certificates and
passports (after a few mishaps where their birth certificates were
issued first for two boys, then for two girls) and we were finally
able to apply for their visas on Friday. Now it is just a waiting
game while we see whether the High Commission will issue the visas we
need before they install a new computer system on Friday… if they
don't issue before Friday, we expect to have at least another week
(while they install the new system) before they can even start.

I have to admit that I have reached the stage where I am getting
increasingly keen to be home. There are really good things about
being here, of course, like John being off work and endless sunshine
and perfect blue skies. But on our last trip we were able to get out
and about and see and do different things, which was great. This time,
unsurprisingly, we are pretty much stuck in the guest house and we
aren't really seeing much of Ethiopia except the view from our
windows. So, it doesn't really feel like there is much point being
here, and I am really wishing that we could be in our own home and
start off the new normal. There are a few annoying things we didn't
bring with us, and a few others where supplies are running low
(really, it seemed like 7kg of formula would be plenty) and the giant
Mothercare store across the street from our house is calling me with
its siren song, luring me with promises of rapid steam sterilisers and
unlimited infant formula. I am trying not to hope too hard that our
visas will be issued quickly, because they almost certainly won't be,
but it would be wonderful to get back - and have the big plane journey
out of the way too!

We've been terrible at replying to emails, and will do our best to
catch up as soon as we can. We are really missing friends and family
and are very much looking forward to seeing people again. Sorry about
the lack of photos on this post - I know you'd all rather see the
babies than read about our visa issues. Hopefully more photos soon -
we are taking them, but convincing this email uploader to process them
is another story entirely.

Lots of love

John and Caroline

Finally!

Here are some photos at last. The last few days have been, frankly,
pretty awful - John and I have both been sick and the babies have been
unwell too. Fortunately we are now all picking up and it's possible to
sit upright again for long enough to type this. We have been so
incredibly thankful to have my mum here - without her I really don't
know HOW we would have coped with the last few days. She has done our
washing and kept us supplied with enough sprite to keep going when we
couldn't hold down anything else - I don't think these attributes are
specifically mentioned in Proverbs 31 but I rather think they should
be.

We are thrilled to say that the babies are doing really, really well.
We hardly recognise them even from the babies they were a few days
ago. They are eating (and eating and eating) and we can see them
gaining strength right before our eyes. They are really delightful and
we are so thankful that they are finally with us.

I really hope sending these photos works, because they are pretty cute, huh??

Much love

John and Caroline

Dear Family and Friends,

We have good news! This morning we attended the First Instance
District court and were officially declared the parents of Isaias
Peter Semir Charles and Lulit Heather Semira Charles.

We are thrilled and very thankful. We will be picking up the babies
later this afternoon, and will post pictures as soon as we get a
chance, we just wanted to pass on the good news now.

Lots of love

John and Caroline

Got snowsuitsGot bearsuits *Got stripes Got wipesGot clothes for him **
Got clothes for his twin
Got books and toys***Got wishes for joy****Got homemade owls
Got baby towels*****Got suitcases packed
(Got help from the cat)
Got nappies******Got happy And so.

Let's go!!*******




* is this child cruelty? I sure hope not.
** check out the tacky but fabulous superman outfit!!
*** the cot is in our room, before you think we've forgotten something major here...
**** sorry about that rhyme.
***** and yes, the towel ALSO has an owl! I didn't make that one though.
****** if you were writing this in the states, what would you rhyme with 'diaper??'
******* 9.30 tonight! And yes, I'm finally ready! For the flight at least, if not for parenthood. It's taken mum and I all of this week to get me sorted with everything that we'll need for the babies, but we're finally there. Prayers needed for no lost luggage, please!! John flies out on Sunday night because there was only one ticket available on the friday night flight. Will post again from Addis as soon as we can.

Court Date

We have finally had a court date allocated! It will be October 27... twelve days time! It's going to be a bit of a rush getting ready to go again, but we can't wait. We're just dying to see those babies again.

So, it seemed like time to fire up the blog again... more updates as they happen!

Update on Plans

Hi all,

Unfortunately, we now have our plane flights back to the UK booked for
early this week. Yesterday, we had to kiss our babies goodbye, which
was pretty much as awful as we thought it would be.

Our overall timeframe should remain the same, the only real change is
that I will be at home (rather than in Addis) for the bit in the
middle. Our completed paperwork was submitted to the Ministry of
Womens Affairs here on Friday, and we are now waiting to be allocated
a court date. We may find out our allocated court date sometime in
the next two weeks - once we know what that date will be (likely to be
around sixish weeks from now) we can make plans for our return.

We are finding the thought of this long separation very hard. We know
that most people who adopt from the UK need to go through this, but we
were hoping to avoid it, and really weren't prepared for how hard it
would be.

We know that some of you have been praying for us and for our babies,
and we appreciate it more than we can say. We have found this sudden
change of plans difficult to deal with (obviously!), and we have very
much appreciated support from family and friends.

We are really dreading going home to an empty house, since I (C) had
thought that next time I went back to Reading it would be with two
wriggly bundles. I also feel extremely stupid since I said all my
goodbyes for three months and will suddenly be back again in less than
three weeks! No teasing please, unless you want to see me cry.
Although you will probably all see me cry anyway.

Lots of love

Caroline and John

Change of Plans

Hi all,

 

The last few weeks have been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster (obviously) and it seems that we've come to an unexpected dip.  Most of you know that I (C) was planning to stay out here until we could bring the babies home with us. We were both very keen that I would stay and get to know the babies, cuddle them as much as possible and make sure they were okay.  However, it seems that this isn't going to happen. I would really like to stay, but the orphanage director has told us that it won't be possible, and I will have to go home next week with John.

 

This makes us incredibly sad.

 

We are very encouraged by the fact that the babies have started to put on weight, but it is heartbreaking to think of leaving them and being unable to see them every day, and not to know whether they are continuing to do well. I'm sure you can all understand that nobody wants to leave their children on the other side of the world!
 

In the next few days, we need to change flight plans and see as much of them as possible. We know that their nannies are taking good care of them, but we really don't want to say goodbye.

 

Lots of love

 

J&C

Gobez!

Gobez means 'good job!' in Amharic, and if the nannies here are to be
believed, it's what you say to a baby when they have drunk a whole
bottle of milk or done something else spectacularly clever.

Well, both of our babies get a big 'Gobez!' this week because they
have both gained 100g! Baby boy is now above his birthweight for the
first time ever. We are hugely relieved. They continue to make lots of
eye contact, and today we heard BB do some pretty convincing
screaming... so we know their lungs are in good working order too.

This is a huge load off our minds - they are still tiny, but it is
wonderful that they are growing.

Lots of love

C&J

One Week In

Hi everyone,

We wrote the post below on the 14th. We've found that it is much
harder than we expected to access the internet here, so we're having a
lot of trouble sending any updates or replying to emails! Since we
wrote the post below, we've been able to see the babies' weight charts
over the last six weeks. Baby Girl has grown by a pound (she started
off at 2.1 kg, but is now 2.6) , but Baby Boy is still only just back
to his birthweight (2.5 kg). Today (as mentioned below) is weigh in
day, but it hasnt' happened yet - we are really praying for an
improvement.

****************************************************

We've been in Addis a week now and are enjoying being here, one of our
favourite things is making it back to our "home" part of town. We
have made it across the city on a few occasions on the blue and white
minibuses which represent free enterprise transport in Addis. The
cost effectiveness of this form of travel (one birr each, about 5p)
and the sense of satisfaction in successfully navigating across the
city via it makes up for the complexity of it for us and the
discomfort of occasionally being compelled by desperation to ram
oneself into an already full space, without the ability to say much
more than "thank you", obviously not always the most appropriate term.

The minibuses are invariably well used blue and white Toyota Hiace
vans with two highly skilled operatives: the driver, obviously a very
important role but requiring the particular skills of being able to
drive as fast as possible and overtake as many other minibuses as
possible but yet be able to stop at any point to pick up a new
customer, preferably without losing their lead on the competition; and
the lad who mans the side door, leaning out shouting the destination,
(Bole Bole Bole!) constantly touting for custom and fitting customers
in all whilst avoiding being crushed by the sliding door when the
minibus makes its sudden stops.

We've today managed to sort out a document we required from the
British Embassy, not particularly easy as we found that we didn't have
the documents they wanted but we managed it on the second attempt
having been able to collect some papers from the orphanage director.
Needless to say we didn't combine the stresses of obtaining this
document with the complexity of travelling by minibus, we know our
limits- we got a taxi, and it still took the whole morning.

We weren't able to see our twins on Sunday so this afternoon's visit
was much anticipated (by us). Baby boy was in a determinedly sleepy
mood so I felt a little hurt when accused by a nanny of deliberately
waking him up. All the evidence clearly pointed to the fact that,
despite my best efforts, he was still not awake. Baby girl woke up,
drank a whole bottle of milk, went back to sleep and still he wasn't
awake. However my persistent singing did finally pay off and once he
woke up C, again with much persistence, persuaded him to drink a
significant portion of his milk quota. We had a good time but all too
short. Wednesday is weigh-in day. We are hoping that all our coaxing
with bottles over the last week will show some improvement in their
size.

Love to all,

John and Caroline

We're here!

(This was written on 11 Sept - we've only just been able to send it).

Well, we've arrived. Was it really only three days ago? It's hard to
know where to start, except with the obvious:

We have met the babies! They are delightful. Both of them are swaddled
very tightly, and wrapped in two layers of blankets, so they really
look like a log of fabric with a face. But in each case, it is a very
very cute little face! Baby girl's is very mobile and expressive, and
when she's not happy she pulls the most magnificent
I-can't-believe-you-are-persecuting-me-like-this frown. Baby boy seems
more placid, and spends much of his awake time staring at whoever is
closest and quietly trying to figure out what is going on. They both
have enormous feet (we looked under the swaddling when the nannies
weren't watching). When they are next to each other, the differences
are easy to see, but they do look very similar and we spent all of our
second morning telling a baby that she was a beautiful, beautiful girl
before one of the nannies told us that BG was actually the sleeping
baby and we were talking to BB. I'm sure he will recover.

Both of them are TINY. We knew they would be little, but it was still
a bit of a shock to see how little. We know that they are eating, but
they have a very long way to go before either of them have any baby
fat rolls. We can't wait to get them home and start Project Chubby.
In the meantime, it is strange (and quite difficult) to see the
children who will be ours under someone else's care. Intellectually we
knew this wouldn't be easy, but it is even more difficult than we
expected to put our sleeping babies down in a cot and know that we
won't be there when they wake up. We had hoped to be able to spend
most of each day at the orphanage, and do a large part of the caring
for our babies, but this is less possible than we had originally
hoped, and we are re-adjusting our expectations. Fortunately, the
care they are receiving is good care, and we know that other babies
who have come in quite tiny are now thriving. We keep telling
ourselves this each time we have to say goodbye to them.

We are staying in a guesthouse that is only a few minutes walk from
the orphanage, which is fantastically convenient. It's great to be
close enough to get around on foot - this is an incredibly interesting
place and we are enjoying getting to know it. Today was New Year
(Melkam Addis Anet, everyone!) so yesterday there was a LOT of
livestock being moved around the city in preparation for celebrations-
this not a good time to be a chicken or a goat in Addis.

We are missing everyone, but really glad to be here. More later!

Lots of love

John and Caroline

What happens next?

Sorry for this boring procedural info, but lots of people have asked us what happens next. Why can't we fly out there, scoop the babies up and be home by the end of the week?

The short answer is that everyone from Britain who adopts from Ethiopia needs to do so independently. There are no accredited agencies that we can work with, so we are responsible for lodging all our own paperwork and complying with all the complicated legalities that surround adoption in any country. (Fortunately, we will have some help!) In Ethiopia, there are two main stages to the process. The first is:

Having a Court Hearing. For the babies to be legally ours, we need to have a court hearing and a judge needs to decree that we are their new parents. Until this happens, the babies are NOT officially our children, and need to remain in the care of the orphanage (and we can't put any pictures of them on this blog or anywhere else on the internet). So, when we arrive, we can visit the babies during the day, but we cannot take them back to our hotel to live with us until after our court hearing.

So how do we get a court date? We need to apply for a hearing, and then wait for a date to be allocated. The courts in Ethiopia are shut until early October, so we won't even find out when our court date will be until probably around the middle of October. Late October is the very earliest that we could possibly have our court date, and it could be much later than this.

John is flying home on the 25th of September to go back to work, but will need to return to Ethiopia for our court hearing. He will then stay out in Ethiopia for the rest of the trip.

If our court hearing is successful, the babies will be ours in the eyes of the Ethiopian government, but not the British government. We will be allowed to take custody of them at this point, but to bring them back into the country, we need to enter stage two:

Getting visas for the babies. The babies are Ethiopian citizens, and will need visas to come into the UK. To get their visas, we will first need to get copies of their birth certificates, and then we will need to have Ethiopian passports issued for them. Once we have passports, we can apply for British visas. This second stage, when the babies are legally ours but we can't yet come home, will probably take about another month.

So, that's where all the time will be going. At the moment, it all feels pretty daunting (especially the part where we begin our parenting careers in a hotel room for a month, approx 15,000 miles from the nearest Tesco) but I know we will be glad that we were able to spend an extended time in the country where our babies were born. This time tomorrow we should be on a plane!

Updates go here....

We've created this blog to update family and friends on what is happening as we travel out to Addis to adopt our twins. Most of you know that we can't post pictures until we have passed court and the babies are legally ours, so you'll have to wait for the cuteness.

We are due to fly on Monday! Better get some organising done.